God’s Words Teach Me How to Approach Middle School Dating

By Yiyi, United States

Teenagers are sentimental, especially when in love; and I was not an exception. But as a Christian, how should I approach puppy love?

One day, I got a QQ message from a boy I knew, “Are you online?” “Yes,” I replied. Soon he sent another message, “Yiyi, I … I think I’m falling in love with you.” At the sight of these words, I was so surprised and simply couldn’t believe my eyes. Goggling at them over and over, I knew I didn’t misread them. “How could it be possible? He and I are only acquaintances at school. How come he has feelings for me?” Out of curiosity, I asked, “What part of me attracts you?” “All of you,” answered he. “But I have plenty of faults.” “I don’t care. Everyone has shortcomings.” Pleased by his words, I couldn’t help thinking, “Maybe I can make friends with him first and see what he is like.” So, I started to interact with him.

how to treat middle school dating

During our interaction, I found that he was not only handsome, but also nice to me. He often patiently helped me with my homework; every day he showed great concern for me, always saying, “Take care of yourself and go to bed early,” or “Don’t study too hard; take a break when tired.” I felt warmth and happiness, as if I were the heroine in a soap opera, fussed over by the hero every day. Gradually I fell in love with him and often imagined how happy we would be in the future. Not long after, he asked me if I was willing to be his girlfriend. Hearing this, I was very happy, thinking, “Should I say yes? He’s so nice to me and cares about me so much; I’ll be happy with him.” But then I had a second thought, “I’m not old enough to date. If I start a relationship with him, it will certainly affect my studies, and I’ll be in no mood to attend gatherings or read God’s words. What should I do?” After a struggle, I refused him and decided to remain my friendship with him.

However, things were not as simple as I had imagined. He started to come into my life. He often actively chatted with me online. Sometimes, when I was doing my homework, he sent me a message and I would stop to chat with him, thus failing to focus on my studies. I couldn’t even settle down to read God’s words in the evening, because what he said to me always floated into my mind; gradually, instead of reading God’s words, I started chatting with him until late into the night. At that time, I often wondered, “Is he my Mr. Right? Should I start a relationship with him? If I’m with him, I’ll be very happy. What’s more, many students are in a relationship, so it’s normal that we date each other.” Thus, I agreed to be his girlfriend and indulged in puppy love. As a result, I not only was in no mood to study but also got further and further from God. Though I knew it was not good for me to experience puppy love, I couldn’t extricate myself from it and indulged in chatting with him every day; whenever I had a free moment, my mind would be occupied with him. In those days, I often came before God and prayed, “Oh God! Now I’m in no mood to study or read Your words, but indulge in his sweet words every day. I know I shouldn’t fall in love at this age, but I enjoy it, unable to extricate myself from it. What should I do? Oh God! Please help me.”

One day, he texted me, “Now we’re freshmen in high school. As the saying goes, ‘Lovers will embrace in freshmen year, will kiss in sophomore year, and in senior year …’ You know what I mean.” At the sight of his frivolous words, I felt a little disgusted and didn’t want to chat with him. Unexpectedly, he then sent another message, “If you don’t give me what I want, I’ll get it by force.” Upon seeing this, I lost my affection for him and felt very angry that he actually disrespected me. Never did I expect that behind his concern and care was his evil motive. It was then that I knew teenagers’ love is just an impulse without any sincerity and that most times their purposes are to fulfill their own selfish desires.

Later, one day, I talked with a sister about this matter. After hearing what I said, she fellowshiped with me, “Nowadays it’s a common phenomenon that teenagers are indulging in puppy love. This is caused by the evil trends of society. Satan uses various methods to deceive and corrupt us. We don’t have the truth or discernment, so we will follow the evil trends of Satan, thinking that it is normal to have a relationship at a young age. This is Satan fooling us.” Then, she sent two passages of God’s words to me: “For example, if you were watching a television show, what sort of things in it could change your view? Would what the performers said, the words themselves, be able to corrupt people? (No.) What sort of things would corrupt people? It would be the core thoughts and content of the show, which would represent the director’s views, and the information carried in these views could sway people’s hearts and minds.” “One after another, all these trends carry an evil influence that continually degenerates man, causing them to continually lose conscience, humanity and reason, and that lowers their morals and their quality of character more and more, to the extent that we can even say the majority of people now have no integrity, no humanity, neither do they have any conscience, much less any reason. … For man who is not of sound body and mind, who never knows what is truth, who cannot tell the difference between positive and negative things, these kinds of trends one after another make them all willingly accept these trends, the life view and values that come from Satan. They accept what Satan tells them on how to approach life and the way to live that Satan ‘bestows’ on them. They have not the strength, neither do they have the ability, much less the awareness to resist.

Through God’s words and the sister’s fellowship, I came to know that it was because of the harmful evil trends of Satan that I indulged in puppy love. Satan instilled the viewpoint of “Love is above all” in me when I watched TV, which made me mistakenly think that love was sweet and beautiful. So I harbored beautiful illusions about love, and thought that it was normal for teenagers to date. When I saw the boy was handsome and considerate toward me, I couldn’t help falling in love with him. Consequently, I wasn’t in the mood to study, but was lost in his honeyed words; with my thoughts occupied by him, I couldn’t even quiet my heart when reading God’s words and thus became more and more distant from God. I’m just a teenager and haven’t reached the age of marriage, but poisoned by Satan’s evil trends, I indulged in puppy love. I lost the ambition a teenager ought to possess and lived a decadent life without a goal. And many students of my age are also deeply poisoned by the viewpoint that “Love is above all” and indulge in evil lusts. Some girls get pregnant and have abortions; some even commit suicide because their partner falls in love with others. Such tragedies are frequently occurring in school. Though parents and teachers rack their brains to educate us not to experience puppy love, their efforts are all to no avail. Now I knew this: Satan uses the evil trends to deceive and corrupt us teenagers, who are immature both physically and mentally and without correct goals in life, so that we can’t distinguish good from evil and establish wrong viewpoints of pursuit; living by these viewpoints, we become more and more degenerate and decadent. Thank God. It was His words that allowed me to have some discernment about Satan’s evil trends and see clearly that Satan was luring me onto the wrong path.

Afterward, I read another passage of God’s words: “Because the essence of God is holy, that means that only through God can you walk the bright, right road through life; only through God can you know the meaning of life, only through God can you live out a real life, possess the truth, know the truth, and only through God can you obtain life from the truth. Only God Himself can help you shun evil and deliver you from the harm and control of Satan. Besides God, no one and nothing can save you from the sea of suffering so that you suffer no longer: This is determined by the essence of God.

Yes, only by understanding the truth could I overcome the seduction and corruption of Satan’s evil trends. In the past, because I didn’t understand the truth, I longed for the romantic love in the soap operas under the influence of the evil trends of society. Every day I couldn’t bend my mind to my studies but lived in an imaginary world of romantic love, losing the vitality and ambition that teenagers should possess. After reading God’s words, I had discernment about Satan’s evil trends, and knew what positive things are and what negative things are; I also understood that only if I pursued the truth and pursued to know God could I live a meaningful life. From now on, I should read God’s words more and pay attention to quieting my heart before God; meanwhile, I should put more efforts into my studies to learn useful knowledge.

Now, under the guidance of God’s words, the tranquil life I once had resumed. Though without sweet words or passionate love, I feel free and liberated. I regularly attend gatherings and perform my duty with my brothers and sisters, living an enriched life. I have recovered the vitality and vigor that a teenager should possess. All the glory be to the almighty and one true God. Amen!

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