Gains From A Score of 73

The final examination was coming. I didn’t worry about my other subjects. However, at the thought of organic chemistry, my worst subject, I felt very anxious. I always wondered how to improve my mark in this subject. If obtaining a low mark in chemistry, I was afraid that my overall achievement would slide. If failing my chemistry examination, I would get more troubles. Desperate, it occurred to me that I had believed in God. God is possessed of authority and has power to dominate over all. I believed that I surely would get a good result by relying on God. Hence, I really studied hard while relying on Him. In class, I took notes when listening to my teacher. To have a solid memory for my notes, I prayed to God, asking Him to strengthen my memory and make me commit the knowledge to memory. And I finished up my home assignments from my teacher carefully. Seeing my roommates playing games, I also wanted to do that to relax myself after a day at study. Yet, I thought if I didn’t do that, but read more God’s words, then God certainly would help me get a good mark in this subject when seeing my “cooperation.” For this reason, I spared my time for playing games to see God’s words. When it came time to attend a meeting, I saw my classmates reviewing their lessons. As I was not good at this subject, I might get a dim result in the end if spending less time than others in reviewing lessons. So I didn’t want to attend the meeting. But then I thought: If I attend the meeting, God will certainly accept me. It will be much better that I get God’s blessings in my examination, than that I review by rote here. Consequently, I gave up my review without the slightest hesitation, and decided to first attend the meeting to “satisfy God.” Before I knew it, the time arrived for the final examination. When thinking of my efforts in this subject and my “cooperation” with God these days, I felt at peace, and believed that this time God would certainly bless me with a good result. On the day I took the examination, I walked toward the examination room with singing a song. I sat calmly in a seat, and prayed to God silently in my heart, “O God! I entrust my examination to You. May You lead me to get a good result. Thank You God.” As time passed one second and one minute at a time, I did my work without difficulty in the previous part, but I was stuck on the last question. In fact, I had seen this question when reviewing lessons. However, I couldn’t remember it at the time. There was shorter and shorter time left before the examination being over. I was even more worried, with my heart thumping violently. Just then, I thought of God, and so I hurried to call out to God silently in my heart, “O, God! Please help me answer this question.” After praying, my heart calmed down little by little. A few moments later, I really remembered a little, and then I wrote it down quickly. I was overjoyed, and repeatedly thanked God for His guidance. A week later, the result came out. My classmates all searched for their marks on the Internet. When hearing their high or low marks, I still felt somewhat nervous. However, thinking of my “cooperation” with God these days, like persisting in reading God’s words and attending meetings, I was sure that God had blessed me with a good result. In addition, God had led me to answer the last question, so my mark could not be too low. With this in my mind, I confidently went to check my marks on the Internet, but only to find I scored 73. I was stunned, and couldn’t help but exclaim, “73? How come I scored so low?” At that time, I was dumb, and spontaneously doubted in my heart: Why do I get such a low mark? Could it be that my teacher made a mistake? No, it couldn’t be. My teacher usually sets a low standard for this kind of examination. Then I thought: I’ve been drawing close to God frequently these days, but how can I receive such a result? Why didn’t God bless me? I could not help feeling particularly depressed. After coming back to my dormitory, I heard my classmate playing games every day say, “I got 75. I merely reviewed a little. It’s so easy. Before I feared that I would fail.” At his words, I could no longer restrain my grievances and complaints: Why could he get a higher mark than me without reviewing every day? How could I get such a low mark? Why didn’t God help me? The more I thought of it, the more I felt miserable and distressed. My heart couldn’t quiet down for a long time. I then remembered that at our usual gatherings my brothers and sisters fellowshiped that we should first practice obedience and not complain when encountering unfavorable things, and that God observes everything. Thereupon, I prayed to God silently in my heart, “O God, this time I didn’t do it well in the test. I feel very distressed now. I cannot see clearly what Your will is with regard to this matter. Please enlighten and guide me to understand Your will, so that I won’t complain anymore.” In a meeting, I told my brothers and sisters this matter. They found a passage of God’s words for me, “What is the problem with people always making demands of God? And what is the problem with them always having conceptions about God? What is contained within people’s nature? I’ve discovered that, regardless of what happens to them, or what they’re dealing with, people always protect their own interests and look out for their own flesh, and they always look for…

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