I Have Learned to Get Along With My Mother-in-low in Harmony

I Have Learned to Get Along With My Mother-in-low in Harmony

By Shunfu, United States I am a post-80s girl. When I was little, my neighbors all praised me for being obedient and sensible, saying I would be able to please my parents-in-law after I grew up and got married. I, too, always thought that good-tempered and easygoing, certainly I would not have any problems getting along with my mother-in-law. It was not until later, when I got married and lived together with my mother-in-law, that I deeply understood why others said that how to deal with the relationship between a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law was a big problem. My mother was a diligent woman, so she seldom asked me to help her cook as I was growing up. Many times when my mother was cooking, I just stood on one side watching but never cooked myself, resulting in my being a poor cook. After my marriage, having my own family, I had to do the cooking myself. In order not to be looked down upon by my mother-in-law, I tried hard to learn to cook. Now it was convenient to go on the internet, where there were various recipes. I thereupon downloaded a cookery book from the internet and tried to make dishes to the recipes in it. However, because I did not have any experience of cooking, if the dishes I made were not too salty, then they were too light. Even sometimes when I fried things, they ended up burnt. When my mother-in-law saw that, she would nag at me endlessly, which made me feel uncomfortable. I thought: Since they are burnt, we can just throw them out. Do you always have to nag at me? You have been making food in the kitchen for decades, but I have cooked just for a few days. How can I compare with you? Every time when I thought of this, I would be in a sulk, for I felt that my mother-in-law only allowed herself to do something wrong. Usually when she cooked at home, she would always make so many dishes that when we failed to eat them up in the hot summer, we had to throw the left-overs away. Once, I was preparing to carry out the rubbish. When I saw the waste food was full of maggots, I was disgusted and was also really angry with my mother-in-law. These trivial matters caused me to dislike her more and more. And I did not want to see her and always hid from her at home. One day, I followed the recipe from the internet and learned to make steamed bread with brown sugar. At first, I mixed the flour and yeast powder in a certain proportion, yet not following the recipe by letters. And then I patiently waited for a long time in accordance with the dough time that the recipe said. After the dough had risen I began to make steamed buns. However, when I took them out of the steamer, I found that they were not that light and palatable, but instead a bit hard. When my mother-in-law saw this, she again started to go on at me, “Look at the buns you steamed. Are they eatable? If you actually can’t make them, call your cousin-in-law next time and learn from her. She can cook delicious food, so you see, her husband is white and fat. Her parents-in-law all praised her for making good meals after they came back from Australia this time. Now her mother-in-law needn’t even cook. Oh! Your cousin-in-law cooks better and better, and she can also make many kinds of snacks. …” Hearing what she said, though I said nothing, I reasoned with her in my heart: It’s true that I failed to make steamed buns right, but I do not ask you to eat them. If you’re not eating, I will eat them by myself. Thus, I packed these steamed buns and then put them in the refrigerator. Two days later, I opened the refrigerator and rummaged around in it, but did not find them. I thought to myself: Strange! The steamed buns do not grow legs, how could they disappear? They must have been thrown out by my mother-in-law. Later my thought proved right. When I knew the truth, I was so angry as to intend to have a huge fight with her. But thinking that I had believed in God, I realized that I could no longer completely live based on my own corrupt disposition like I did before when I believed in the Lord, for now God requires us to experience and live by His words. So I told myself that I could not go quarreling with my mother-in-law; nevertheless, in my heart I was still full of complaints about her, not wanting to talk to or see her. Also I was in depression because of this matter. Then the meeting time came. At the gathering, when the brothers and sisters saw that I was in a poor condition, they asked me with concern what had happened to me recently that I looked like something’s on my mind. At that time, I poured out all my grievances to them, as if having found my bosom friends. As I said, many things that my mother-in-law did not do well popped into my mind. For example, She was always the last to have dinner. And after she finished eating, she would leave her bowl on the table and then directly go away. She never cleared the table after her meal even if it was very messy. And it was always I who had to clear it when I went to the kitchen the next morning. Various trifling matters like this caused me to be full of complaints about my mother-in-law. After the brothers and sisters finished hearing my words, they read to me a passage of Sermons and Fellowship on Entry Into Life: “If you want to have patience toward others, you first need to understand them, meaning no…

how to treat middle school dating

God’s Words Teach Me How to Approach Middle School Dating

By Yiyi, United States Teenagers are sentimental, especially when in love; and I was not an exception. But as a Christian, how should I approach puppy love? One day, I got a QQ message from a boy I knew, “Are you online?” “Yes,” I replied. Soon he sent another message, “Yiyi, I … I think I’m falling in love with you.” At the sight of these words, I was so surprised and simply couldn’t believe my eyes. Goggling at them over and over, I knew I didn’t misread them. “How could it be possible? He and I are only acquaintances at school. How come he has feelings for me?” Out of curiosity, I asked, “What part of me attracts you?” “All of you,” answered he. “But I have plenty of faults.” “I don’t care. Everyone has shortcomings.” Pleased by his words, I couldn’t help thinking, “Maybe I can make friends with him first and see what he is like.” So, I started to interact with him. During our interaction, I found that he was not only handsome, but also nice to me. He often patiently helped me with my homework; every day he showed great concern for me, always saying, “Take care of yourself and go to bed early,” or “Don’t study too hard; take a break when tired.” I felt warmth and happiness, as if I were the heroine in a soap opera, fussed over by the hero every day. Gradually I fell in love with him and often imagined how happy we would be in the future. Not long after, he asked me if I was willing to be his girlfriend. Hearing this, I was very happy, thinking, “Should I say yes? He’s so nice to me and cares about me so much; I’ll be happy with him.” But then I had a second thought, “I’m not old enough to date. If I start a relationship with him, it will certainly affect my studies, and I’ll be in no mood to attend gatherings or read God’s words. What should I do?” After a struggle, I refused him and decided to remain my friendship with him. However, things were not as simple as I had imagined. He started to come into my life. He often actively chatted with me online. Sometimes, when I was doing my homework, he sent me a message and I would stop to chat with him, thus failing to focus on my studies. I couldn’t even settle down to read God’s words in the evening, because what he said to me always floated into my mind; gradually, instead of reading God’s words, I started chatting with him until late into the night. At that time, I often wondered, “Is he my Mr. Right? Should I start a relationship with him? If I’m with him, I’ll be very happy. What’s more, many students are in a relationship, so it’s normal that we date each other.” Thus, I agreed to be his girlfriend and indulged in puppy love. As a result, I not only was in no mood to study but also got further and further from God. Though I knew it was not good for me to experience puppy love, I couldn’t extricate myself from it and indulged in chatting with him every day; whenever I had a free moment, my mind would be occupied with him. In those days, I often came before God and prayed, “Oh God! Now I’m in no mood to study or read Your words, but indulge in his sweet words every day. I know I shouldn’t fall in love at this age, but I enjoy it, unable to extricate myself from it. What should I do? Oh God! Please help me.” One day, he texted me, “Now we’re freshmen in high school. As the saying goes, ‘Lovers will embrace in freshmen year, will kiss in sophomore year, and in senior year …’ You know what I mean.” At the sight of his frivolous words, I felt a little disgusted and didn’t want to chat with him. Unexpectedly, he then sent another message, “If you don’t give me what I want, I’ll get it by force.” Upon seeing this, I lost my affection for him and felt very angry that he actually disrespected me. Never did I expect that behind his concern and care was his evil motive. It was then that I knew teenagers’ love is just an impulse without any sincerity and that most times their purposes are to fulfill their own selfish desires. Later, one day, I talked with a sister about this matter. After hearing what I said, she fellowshiped with me, “Nowadays it’s a common phenomenon that teenagers are indulging in puppy love. This is caused by the evil trends of society. Satan uses various methods to deceive and corrupt us. We don’t have the truth or discernment, so we will follow the evil trends of Satan, thinking that it is normal to have a relationship at a young age. This is Satan fooling us.” Then, she sent two passages of God’s words to me: “For example, if you were watching a television show, what sort of things in it could change your view? Would what the performers said, the words themselves, be able to corrupt people? (No.) What sort of things would corrupt people? It would be the core thoughts and content of the show, which would represent the director’s views, and the information carried in these views could sway people’s hearts and minds.” “One after another, all these trends carry an evil influence that continually degenerates man, causing them to continually lose conscience, humanity and reason, and that lowers their morals and their quality of character more and more, to the extent that we can even say the majority of people now have no integrity, no humanity, neither do they have any conscience, much less any reason. … For man who is not of sound body and mind, who never knows what is…

Eastern Lightning, The church of Almighty God

Who Put an End to the Quarrelling? (II)

Later, I saw God’s words saying: “One after another, all these trends carry an evil influence that continually degenerates man, that lowers their morals and their quality of character more and more, to the extent that we can even say the majority of people now have no integrity, no humanity, neither do they have any conscience, much less any reason. … The majority of people, however, in the midst of their unawareness, will still be continually infected, assimilated and attracted by this kind of trend, until they all unknowingly and involuntarily accept it, and are all submerged in and controlled by it. For man who is not of sound body and mind, who never knows what is truth, who cannot tell the difference between positive and negative things, these kinds of trends one after another make them all willingly accept these trends, the life view, the life philosophies and values that come from Satan. They accept what Satan tells them on how to approach life and the way to live that Satan ‘bestows’ on them. They have not the strength, neither do they have the ability, much less the awareness to resist” (“God Himself, the Unique VI”). After reading God’s words, I suddenly became aware: My husband is addicted to playing mahjong, for he is unconsciously affected and influenced by the evil trend of Satan, and then goes to play uncontrollably. Now what is popular in this society? As a man, you should be able to smoke, drink and play mahjong. Otherwise, you are not a man and your life is not meaningful. Satan uses various kinds of evil social trends to corrode our thoughts and spirits in order to make us follow our fleshly desires and abandon ourselves to vice. Since we were corrupted by Satan, we have lost the ability to discern the positive and the negative. And we have no exact standard of distinguishing between justice and wickedness, good and evil, beauty and ugliness. Besides, we can’t see through the sinister motives of Satan corrupting us, so we are naturally tricked by Satan and sink low. Satan makes us indulge in playing mahjong to destroy our resolutions little by little, and deceive and control us in order that we have no time to worship God and are ever more distant from God. Finally we will stray away from God, betray God and become a man belonging to Satan that we will be eliminated and destroyed by God. Thank God for His guidance and enlightenment, I have seen through the tricks of Satan and the sinister motives of it corrupting man. Both my husband and I are victims as well. I can’t quarrel with him by my arrogant nature any more. At this moment, I bore him no grudge in my heart, and determined not to control him by my arrogant nature. He is also in God’s hand. I should rely on God and experience God’s words with him to resolve our corrupt satanic dispositions and overcome Satan’s cruelty and tests. Then I prayed to God to help my husband see through Satan’s scheme, break away from the evil trends as soon as possible, and get rid of Satan’s talons. One night, I woke up and find that my husband didn’t still come back because of his playing mahjong. I wanted to rage against him again: You give free rein to your temper and don’t return as yet. Where is my place in your heart? … Thinking of this, I suddenly realized that my condition was incorrect. I wanted to teach him by my arrogant nature once again. At that moment, I remembered God’s words that I saw before: “In every step of work that God does within people, externally it appears to be interactions between people, as if born of human arrangements, or from human interference. But behind the scenes, every step of work, and everything that happens, is a wager made by Satan before God, and requires people to stand firm in their testimony to God. … Thus, in everything there is a battle, and when there is a battle within you, thanks to your actual cooperation and actual suffering God works within you. Ultimately, inside you are able to put the matter aside and the anger is naturally extinguished. Such is the effect of your cooperation with God” (“Only Loving God Is Truly Believing in God”). I nearly and fell for Satan’s tricks. From its surface appearance, my husband came back late, but in fact, it was a bet between Satan and God. God was seeing whether I would practice the truth to satisfy Him or whether I would live by Satan’s corrupt dispositions. It was just time for me to stand witness for God. So I should actually cooperate with God and shouldn’t let Satan’s scheme succeed. Having a knowledge of God’s will, I prayed to God silently to lead me to break through the shackles of Satan’s dark influence, living within God’s words. After the prayer, I was not angry gradually. Then, my husband came back. I did not blow him up, but spoke calmly with him. He said in surprise: “I thought you would take it out on me as usual. I never thought that you had transformed. Alas, you don’t know, in fact, when playing mahjong, I didn’t feel peaceful within but felt the condemnation placed on my conscience. I know God hates this, but I always can’t control myself.” Hearing his words, I saw again Satan’s hatefulness, and said to him: “I’m dominated by my arrogant satanic nature, and always blow you up. Through reading God’s words and praying to God, I have understood that you are also influenced by the society trends and harmed by Satan. I’m not angry with you. God’s words are the truth and a sole powerful weapon with which we can overcome Satan. As long as we rely on God more, read more of God’s words and practice God’s words, God will help us…

Who Put an End to the Quarrelling? (I)

Not long after my marriage, I didn’t go to work because I was pregnant. In daytime, my husband went to work, and my parents-in-law were busy with farm work, while I could only stay home boringly. Sometimes I watched TV or did some housework, but most times, I had nothing to do. Consequently, I felt so fed up that I expected that my husband could return home early after his work to chat with me. However, when he came off work, he directly went out to play mahjong after the meal. It wasn’t until midnight that he came back. For this reason, I felt so suppressed. Every time when he arrived home, I got at him. At that moment, what he said was well and he promised that he would no longer come back home too late. Yet he still did as before. Seeing he was never obedient to me, I thought: We just got married not long ago but you treat me like this. Now what I say doesn’t work. There’s still a long way ahead of us. Won’t you take notice of me at all in the future? No, I must come up with a plan to make you quietly obey me. One night, seeing my husband return so late, I said to him angrily: “I’m not asking that you don’t play mahjong. But can you spend less time on it? If you go on like this, then I’ll be done with this marriage. Tomorrow I’m going back to my parent’s place.” Seeing I was really angry, he quickly made an apology. But I didn’t accept his apology for I decided to have it in for him. The next morning, I didn’t have breakfast and went back to my parents’ house. At night, my husband went to pick me up after his work. He said: “This time I’ve truly known I was wrong. I won’t go home so late any more. Please go back with me.” Hearing his repentance and considering our parents’ concern about us, I went home with him. I thought he would not play mahjong too late after this experience. However, he just kept the promise for several days. Wherefore, I often quarreled with him, with tears running down my face. I beat him and kicked up a ruckus. Both the carrot and the stick were used, but all of these were still in vain. We went through several years of quarrel in that way. During the several years, I was in agony on the inside. I did not know when such a life would end and why he did not listen to me. Just when our marriage was about to break down, God’s salvation came to my husband and me. I saw that God’s words say: “Adam and Eve created by God in the beginning were holy people, which is to say, whilst in the Garden of Eden they were holy, untainted with filth. They were also faithful to Jehovah, and knew nothing of the betrayal of Jehovah. This is because they were without the disturbance of the influence of Satan, were without Satan’s poison, and were the purest of all mankind. They lived in the Garden of Eden, undefiled by any filth, unpossessed by the flesh, and in reverence of Jehovah. Later, when they were tempted by Satan, they had the poison of the serpent, and the desire to betray Jehovah, and they lived under the influence of Satan. In the beginning, they were holy and revered Jehovah; only like this were they human. Later on, after they were tempted by Satan, they ate the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and lived under the influence of Satan. They were gradually corrupted by Satan, and lost the original image of man” (“The Experiences of Peter: His Knowledge of Chastisement and Judgment”). From God’s words I knew: Adam and Eve created by God in the beginning had no corrupt disposition and worshiped God. Later, after being tempted and corrupted by Satan, they began to have various corrupt satanic dispositions. Furthermore, today, our corrupt satanic dispositions have become more and more serious, and we humans don’t have any likeness of the man created by God in the beginning. Through a period of fellowshiping about God’s words at the meetings, I knew that God’s work during the last days is to express the truth, judge, chastise and purify the deeply corrupt mankind, in order that we, through reading and practicing God’s word, can shed the satanic corrupt disposition, live out the manner of a true person, be taken into the kingdom and regain the life that Adam and Eve lived. This is also God’s original intention in creating man. In addition, I realized: That I quarreled with my husband in the past is because I have an arrogant corrupt satanic disposition, and want to take charge of him and let him listen to me. Only by reading God’s words more and practicing God’s words can I achieve a transformation and then escape from these sufferings. After knowing these things, I practiced forsaking my corrupt satanic dispositions consciously by eating and drinking God’s words so that I wouldn’t live such a hard life any more. But because I am deeply corrupted by Satan and there are deep-rooted Satan’s poisons from inside of me, it is not easy for me to change. To purify and change me, God arranged a real environment for me. After believing in God, my husband wanted to read God’s words more and didn’t want to play mahjong any longer. However, when he just got off work and his mahjong friends frequently called him to play, he could not resist the allure, and went to play again for the sake of saving face. Because I didn’t have a knowledge of God’s work, I still wanted to change him in my ways, even giving him an ultimatum: Don’t come back home if you don’t get home before 9:00 p.m….

More »